We often come across a situation where we feel hurt for ourselves out of some random conversation or else get hurt on feedback given by a friend. Of Course, a negative feedback. And now you are thinking of the unseen horns and excused grown nails of your friend that hurt you. You picture them as critic and feel lost. You are hurt for the feedback and feel low. It is not at times about the feedback which is expected it Is about who gave it that matters. You feel like you friend stabbed you in the back and you tend to carry that stab along with you lifelong.
I am talking about the misunderstanding and the ego fights among the loved ones or friends. We tend to hold very flowery and goody image of a friend we hold a rough and hurting image of a critic.
Putting some light on it lets us see how the critic helps us improve or show better performance. How important is to have a critic in life? Every friend should be a critic to make you understand where you stand. We have often seen in movies that the best of friends get away from each other due to some ego issues or silly issues. We watch it till end thinking why do people never sit across the table and just speak about. Why carry those silly egos and fights. We come easily for opinion for others to overcome. Being a critic is easy art obtained by many of us. You can just shake it off like a hairy fluffy doggy, ignore the haters, try and prove them wrong or welcome your critic along, to direct you. It would be less rattling if we were surrounded by cheerleaders and encouragers isn’t it?
But too often your biggest critic is someone you love, you
share every part of bit, someone you are closer to. If you come up with an
exclusive idea of your next venture and you are told about all the negatives
possibilities, limitations and terrible outcomes and hundreds of reasons for
not doing it. Does that put you off??
Your critic can be your biggest asset
1. Your critic will find all the faults
in your plans, probably he /she could see something, think something that you
cannot see. That gives you a different insight. They may sound like fault
finding but believe that are actual loopholes.
2. Sometimes hearing other people speak
gives your thought an ignite, and courage to speak.
3. Your critic may help you approach you
had not thought of, which your future customer may voice up.
4. Your critic wants you to be just you,
do not get it twisted thinking he /she is just about negativity for you. As
that would bring the best of you.
Critics are not essentially, bad you need one who can show
you the worst possibilities and overcome obstacles. It is better to have a genuine
critic than having a foolish friend.
We have a saying Marathi “Nindakache ghar asave shejari”. Which
means you should have a critic neighbour. The famous appraisal system in the organisation
is not only about salary rise but Feedback from your critic, you boss, and who
actually helps you to grow. You may immediately not feel very happy about the feedback
but in long term you will realise, most things you have learned in life
are in hard times, having critics
around.
So let the critic be…..and grow.
